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Writer's pictureBest Ever You

Breaking Free from Old Patterns: The Secret to Lasting Change

By Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino and Dr. Katie Eastman



Change can be a catalyst for growth and transformation, yet many of us find ourselves stuck in the same patterns, even when we desperately want to move forward. These patterns—rooted in old habits, beliefs, and fears—act like invisible anchors, holding us back from the life we envision.


In our books, The Change Guidebook: How to Align Your Heart, Truths, and Energy to Find Success in All Areas of Your Life and Uplifting: Inspiring Stories of Loss, Change, and Growth, we share practical tools and inspiring stories of individuals who have transformed their lives by confronting and releasing these old patterns. Together, in our Hay House book, Percolate: Let Your Best Self Filter Through, we explore how embracing change and letting your best self "percolate" through can help you create a meaningful and fulfilling life.


Why Old Patterns Hold Us Back

Our habits and beliefs are shaped by past experiences and reinforced over time. While some patterns serve us well, others can become barriers to growth, especially during periods of change.

Common patterns that hinder growth include:

  • Fear of Failure: Avoiding risks due to fear of making mistakes.

  • Self-Doubt: Believing we’re not capable or deserving of success.

  • Comfort in the Familiar: Clinging to routines, even when they no longer align with our goals.

  • Limiting Beliefs: Internalized messages like “I’m not good enough” or “Change is too hard.”

These patterns often operate on autopilot, making them difficult to recognize. However, with intention and self-awareness, we can begin to identify and break free from them.


How to Break Free from Old Patterns

Here are some strategies to help you release old habits and beliefs, paving the way for lasting change:

  1. Identify the Pattern

    Awareness is the first step. Pay attention to recurring thoughts, behaviors, or feelings that arise when you’re faced with change. Ask yourself:

    • What’s holding me back?

    • Where did this belief or habit come from?

    • How is it impacting my ability to move forward?


  2. Challenge Limiting Beliefs

    Once you’ve identified a limiting belief, question its validity. Is it based on fact, or is it a story you’ve been telling yourself? Replace self-limiting thoughts with empowering ones. For example, change “I can’t handle this” to “I’m learning to handle this one step at a time.”


  3. Create New Habits

    Old patterns are often tied to familiar routines. To break free, introduce small, intentional changes to your daily life. These shifts might include journaling, practicing mindfulness, or setting aside time for reflection.


  4. Seek Support

    Breaking old patterns can feel daunting, but you don’t have to do it alone. Share your goals with a trusted friend, mentor, or coach who can offer encouragement and accountability.


  5. Celebrate Progress

    Transformation doesn’t happen overnight. Celebrate small victories along the way, and remind yourself that progress—even if it’s slow—is still progress.


Stories of Transformation

In Uplifting, Dr. Katie shares the story of Mia, a woman who spent years avoiding change out of fear of failure. Stuck in a job she no longer loved, Mia convinced herself that pursuing her dreams was too risky. Through self-reflection and support, Mia identified her fear as a pattern rooted in childhood experiences of being criticized for mistakes. By challenging this belief and taking small steps—like enrolling in a part-time course—Mia began to build confidence. Over time, she transitioned to a career she was passionate about, breaking free from her old pattern of self-doubt.


In The Change Guidebook, Elizabeth discusses the power of aligning your energy and truths with your actions. She shares how even small, consistent changes can lead to monumental shifts in your life. Carlos, for example, believed that asking for help was a sign of weakness. This belief kept him isolated during a period of significant change. When he finally sought support, Carlos discovered that connection and collaboration were strengths, not weaknesses.


The Secret to Lasting Change

Lasting change doesn’t happen by accident—it’s the result of intentional effort to break free from the patterns that no longer serve us. While the process can be challenging, it’s also incredibly rewarding.


By identifying old habits, challenging limiting beliefs, and creating new, empowering routines, we can transform our lives in ways we never thought possible.


Moving Beyond Change to Transformation

Breaking free from old patterns is just the beginning of a deeper journey toward personal transformation. Once we clear these barriers, we create space to align with our authentic selves and pursue a life that resonates with our core values. This process often involves cultivating new habits of gratitude, forgiveness, and resilience. As we strengthen these practices, they not only anchor us during periods of change but also serve as the foundation for meaningful, lasting growth.

Growth is not linear—it comes with challenges and setbacks. But every step we take to shift from limiting beliefs to empowering truths sets us closer to living fully and authentically. Remember, transformation is not about perfection; it’s about progress and alignment with the best version of yourself.



About the Authors

Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino is a master life coach, speaker, and founder of The Best Ever You Network. She is the author of several transformational books, including The Change Guidebook: How to Align Your Heart, Truths, and Energy to Find Success in All Areas of Your Life and co-author of the Hay House book Percolate: Let Your Best Self Filter Through. Elizabeth’s work focuses on helping individuals and organizations navigate change with clarity and purpose, encouraging them to embrace their true potential.


Dr. Katie Eastman is a licensed psychotherapist, certified life coach, and author of Uplifting: Inspiring Stories of Loss, Change, and Growth. She has over 30 years of experience helping individuals and organizations manage transitions, grief, and personal growth. As co-author of Percolate: Let Your Best Self Filter Through, she blends her expertise with Elizabeth’s to inspire readers to break free from old patterns and embrace transformative change.


Together, Elizabeth and Dr. Katie are dedicated to helping people align their lives with their authentic selves, fostering growth, resilience, and a sense of purpose.

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