When the House Feels Too Full (and Also a Little Empty): Navigating Change, Clutter, and Crossroads

By Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino

We just got back from South Carolina, and to be honest in snowbird fashion, the transition back to Maine hasn’t been easy this year. We mis-timed our return and

the weather greeted us with a sharp reality check: snow, wind, and the all-too-familiar feeling of being housebound. A week ago, I was enjoying daily water aerobics, fresh air, and the lightness of easy movement. Now, my world feels a little heavier both outside and inside. Still, I’m grateful for the time we had in the sunshine and for the awareness that came with the shift. Gratitude doesn’t erase discomfort, but it does offer perspective.

Inside our home, we’re facing a new season of life. The kids are growing up and moving out. Their rooms, once vibrant and filled with life, now sit quiet and are still echoing with memories, laughter, and a bit of heartbreak. I walk past those doors and wonder: what now?  It feels like just yesterday they were playing on the floor or calling out for bedtime stories. While the silence in those spaces is new, it’s softened by pride, because we’ve always known our little birds were meant to fly. And fly they are, with courage, grace, and everything we hoped to give them.

What do I do with the toys they no longer play with? The books they outgrew? The trophies, the games, the holiday decorations? The bins filled with “someday we’ll need this” items? The closets that became holding spaces for childhood?

And beyond the sentimental, there’s the practical: We returned home to a looming and expected task of replacing the septic tank. Yes, we knew it was going to have to happen. Yet still, that, paired with the shift in lifestyle and season, left me feeling something I don’t always name: confused. And honestly, a little lost.

This feeling isn’t just about clutter or home maintenance. It’s about change and how we hold it, move with it, and make peace with it.

I’ve always felt blessed to have a home filled with love, warmth, and things we care about. But lately, I’ve started asking deeper questions:

• What are we holding onto and why?

• How do we honor the past while making space for what’s next?

• Can we live more intentionally without letting go of what matters most?

If you’re reading this and nodding your head please know that you’re not alone. You might be standing in a similar season: kids moving out, lifestyle shifts, health changes, a yearning for simplicity. And maybe, like me, you’re struggling to say it out loud, because you feel like you should be grateful.

Let me tell you this: gratitude and overwhelm can coexist. One doesn’t cancel out the other. You can be deeply grateful and still feel unsettled. You can love your life and still feel like parts of it are asking for transformation.

So, how do we navigate this messy, beautiful, in-between season? Here’s what I’m learning and what I hope helps you too.

1. Acknowledge the In-Between

We’re not where we were, and we’re not quite where we’re going. This space, this liminal space, is often the most uncomfortable. But it’s also where growth happens.

Sit with it. Listen to it. Don’t rush to fill the silence with stuff or distractions. This is where clarity begins.

2. Honor the Past — Without Hoarding It

Your memories are not contained in the objects, they’re in you.

Create one bin per child, labeled and filled with their most meaningful items. Let them help decide what stays. Take photos of things you want to remember but don’t need to keep. Make digital scrapbooks. Tell the stories that matter.

Then, release the rest with love. Donate, gift, recycle. Say, “Thank you for the joy. It’s time to make space for what’s next.”

3. Reimagine, Don’t Just Repurpose

Empty rooms are not a loss, they’re an invitation.

Ask yourself: What do I need now?

• A space to write?

• A quiet corner to reflect?

• A yoga studio?

• A cozy guest room?

Let your home evolve with you. Just as your family has grown, your space can too. It’s okay to let it look different. It’s okay to let it feel new.

4. Start Small. Release the Guilt.

You don’t need to declutter everything at once. Start with a drawer. One shelf. One memory box. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about moving forward with love. Guilt has no place in your growth. Yesterday, for example, we tackled 2 dressers and a closet. We wound up face-timing with two of our sons to go through what they wanted to keep and what they wanted to donate. We wound up with 7 bags of clothes and other items donated to Goodwill. Today, my husband and older son are on their way to deliver one of those dressers and a car load of other items to our son and his fiancée who just moved into an apartment.

5. Listen to Your Lifestyle

South Carolina gave us ease with sunshine, movement, and freedom. Maine, right now, feels more restrictive. We’re asking big questions:

• Do we want to live here all year?

• Is there a better rhythm we can create seasonally?

• What supports our health, well-being, and happiness?

You don’t need all the answers. But you do deserve to ask the questions. Designing a lifestyle that honors your whole self, physically, emotionally, spiritually, is part of living fully.

6. Embrace the Sacred Discomfort

This space you’re in? It’s sacred. It’s not failure. It’s not loss. It’s an invitation to feel, to let go, and to become. You’re shedding an old season. Of course it feels uncertain. Of course you’re overwhelmed. That’s what happens when you’re stepping into your next chapter.

7. Practice Gratitude Without Pressure

You don’t have to force gratitude. But you can invite it gently.

Write down three things you’re grateful for each day. Let it be simple:

• The way your house creaks in the morning.

• A warm mug between your hands.

• A memory that makes you laugh.

Let gratitude guide you, not silence you.

8. Invite Others Into the Conversation

You don’t have to carry this season alone. Talk to your family. Your friends. Your community.

Ask them:

• What did you hold onto that you wish you let go of?

• How did you repurpose your kids’ rooms?

• What’s helped you transition into an empty nest?

And if you’re someone whose nest isn’t empty yet — or maybe never will be — this still applies. Because at some point, life asks all of us to grow through letting go.

9. Redefine What “Home” Means

Home isn’t just walls and stuff. It’s a feeling. It’s a way of living.

Let your home be a reflection of your values:

• Peace over perfection.

• Space over storage.

• Memories over material.

• Intention over accumulation.

  
  

10. Let Gratitude and Grace Lead the Way

Here’s what I know:

You can be overwhelmed and grateful. You can be confused and grounded. You can feel unsure — and still be okay.

So today, I’m letting go of shame. I’m releasing what no longer fits. I’m walking through the house — big, beautiful, and a little cluttered — with new eyes.

And I’m whispering, thank you.

Not just to the stuff — but to the memories. To the love that filled these rooms. To the version of me who kept it all going.

And most of all — to the woman I’m becoming next.

You’re not alone in this. You’re not wrong for feeling how you feel. And you’re not behind.

You’re right on time.

So take the first step. Breathe. And begin again.

Love,

Elizabeth

About Me

I’m Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino — bestselling author, speaker, and founder of The Best Ever You Network. I help individuals and organizations navigate change, embrace personal growth, and create lives filled with purpose, peace, and resilience. Whether through one-on-one coaching, keynote speaking, or my bestselling books like The Change Guidebook, I bring people back to their truth, energy, and potential. If my story resonated with you, or you’d like to collaborate, invite me to speak, or explore working together — I’d love to hear from you.